Hey K. 

I know it’s a been a really long time. But if I don’t write this here, I’m gonna send it to you and I can only imagine that won’t end well. It’s been 5 years since everything and there isn’t a single day that goes by where I don’t wish I could have fixed it then rather than let us break the way we did. I was sick back then, and didn’t acknowledge the damage my brain was doing to our relationship and for that I am truly sorry. 

Now 5 years later, I hear you’re single again. And it broke my heart because I want more than anything to call you and tell you I still love you and want that life we imagined together. Kids and all. 

If I could find someone that loves me the way I felt loved back then, maybe I could stop thinking about you and finally feel like a whole person again. I know you’ve moved on, and I’m sure seeing my name drives a knife of hate through you, and I’m sorry. I thought we had the love only writers and artists truly know, the poetic and endless type. But I hurt you, and I ruined it, and though I’d give my all to make it up to you I know that isn’t what you want. So for everyone’s sake, I’ll keep this letter here and hope one day I really can love again. And I hope that you’re happy out there, and safe, and loved. And I hope one day I can be too.

You deserve the world K. 

I love you, today, tomorrow and forever. 

S