Since you refuse to see me and everyone is tired of hearing me talk about it, I have no choice but to write a letter here. Hopefully this will help me get over it once and for all, but who knows.
I want to start with how mad I am at you. We both mutually agreed to end it, yet I feel that isn’t what you are telling people. You are probably telling them how I tried to control you, yet in reality I was trying to get myself involved. You may never see it that way, but thats how it was. I was never trying to dominate you because lets be real there is no dominating you. So yes, Im pissed off that Im forever going to be perceived as the bad guy in your family for something that ended on equal terms. Im also mad how you refuse to make an effort with me. You are the one who still said we were best friends still and always wanted me around, yet you told me today to “leave you alone”. I don’t understand what made you change your mind. Everyone thinks its absurd that you refuse to talk to me because that would be the best thing to do at this time.
I have tried several times to contact you each hoping they would end on good terms. Don’t get me wrong I don’t want you back, but some friendship like we said would have been nice. Yet everything ends in disaster and you cursing and belittling me.
Im here to tell you that it ends today. Im not standing for the belittling anymore. You tell me to grow up, yet I think the issue is that I have been mature for a while now and its finally catching up to you. Im sorry I chose not to go out and party like you do all the time, but I don’t need the alcohol to have fun. I can have as much fun sitting on my bed watching a movie. I am a strong person who doesn’t deserve the way you left me on these terms.
Now that I have gotten that out, I want to say thank you. You were my first boyfriend and showed up when I thought I wasn’t going to be with anyone. You taught me how to love and there will always be a part of me that loves you. You mean the world to me and the fact that you can turn around and walk away from that so easily stabs me in the heart so badly. Vin we had our who lives planed out. We were supposed to have our child walk around where we grew up and show where we first met. Who knows maybe that stuff will still happen because the future is crazy like that, but Im not holding my breath.
This letter wraps up any last minute things I have to say to you. You won’t see this ever, nor will you ever hear me say it to you out loud but getting out makes me feel better.
I just want to make sure you’re happy in life because after all the bad things you’ve put me through in the last week, Im still willing to see you happy even if that means being with another man. We may not have worked out, but that doesn’t mean you won’t find anyone ever again. Were young and have our whole lives to fall in love and if our paths cross again then so be it. But until then good luck my friend and be safe. You mean the world to me and always will.